“It doesn’t matter what you eat if you don’t include who is eating – body, mind and soul. Your whole self matters.” Tery Mosey, The Hidden Messages in Food If you operate on autopilot in many of your social interactions, you’re definitely from this planet. You must therefore have a shiny collection of time-tested, safe, …
Divorce – When Blood Is Not Thicker Than Water
“While many say that finding compassion for those who hurt them is one of the hardest things they’ve ever done, others discover that it’s freeing in ways they hadn’t imagined. It binds them to a common humanity where we are all in some measure flawed, torn, and hurt. And dying for understanding.” Joshua Coleman, Rules …
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The Power of Language in Self-Discovery
“He gave man speech, and speech created thought, Which is the measure of the universe.” P. B. Shelley, Prometheus Unbound I’ll never forget the day when I, a 26-year-old woman with wavy hair flowing past my mid-back, sat on the lady barber’s chair and asked her to shave off my hair, à la Kojak (to …
Honouring Our Body, Honouring Our Life
“Have you seen the fool that corrupted his own live body?” Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass “What in the world is the matter with you? I just don’t get it. I’ve had your back since day one, OK? I’ve done my best to get your attention: whispering, muttering, speaking, rambling, shouting, screaming, sometimes in such …
Our Shoulds – The Thorns in Our Side
“The realisation of any present shortcomings is unbearable for anybody harassed by dictatorial shoulds,” Karen Horney, Neurosis and Human Growth “You mustn’t put chewing gum in your sister’s hair.” I remember saying that to my little son, along with a series of explanations why his sister’s hair was not the best place to land that …
Adult Child Estrangement: Living With the Pain
“If your kids are unable to see you as worthy of love, acceptance, and forgiveness, then you have to find redemption in that small crack in the continuum of catastrophe, as Walter Benjamin put it.” James Coleman, Rules of Engagement “So, how’s your daughter doing?” I asked my new acquaintance behind the wheel of her …
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A Leap of Faith
“I've got a magic charmThat I keep up my sleeve,I can walk the ocean floorAnd never have to breathe,” “Life Doesn’t Frighten Me” by Maya Angelou “Should I do this or not?” Tell me you didn’t ask yourself this question when it came to buying a house, having a child, getting married or divorced, accepting …
The Mind Button
" 'Do you see over yonder, friend Sancho, thirty or forty hulking giants? I intend to do battle with them and slay them.' (...) 'Alas,' said Sancho, 'those be not giants, but windmills.' " Cervantes, Don Quixote One thing we love about electronic devices is the certainty that, by pressing a single button, we get …
Parents’ Haunting Shadows
“We have met the enemy and he is us." Walt Kelly, Pogo "Of course I would do anything for my child!" There are very few statements spoken with absolute conviction, leaving no room for doubt, and this is one of them. "Would you confront your personal shadow?" The parent's answer may not be uttered so …
The Art of Suffering for Nothing
"One of the hardest expressions of self-assertiveness is challenging your liniting beliefs." Nathaniel Branden, The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem "Would you eat a worm? Or press the button and shock yourself?" You probably wouldn't expect to be asked such bizarre questions – but how would you answer anyway? If you say, "I'd never do that," …
